This is part two of the conversation I had with Adam.
In Part 2, Adam and I talk about:
- Advice from Brandon Steiner – how much to you should do for other people
- Finding something you like in the other person as the key to rapport
- Being fundamentally curious
- Maximizing your time, relationships, and effectiveness
- Surround yourself with awesome people
Adam Connors is the Founder & CEO of NetWorkWise, a company that expedites outcomes for individuals and organizations by providing education in the science and art of networking. He’s a sought-after speaker who empowers people through online training and in-person workshops with the expertise to cultivate world-class relationships. He is the podcast host of Conversations with Connors and creator of the esteemed NetWorkWise Certification, a credential that validates the accomplishment of being a leader in fostering connectivity.
An entrepreneur at heart, for more than 20 years Adam has been influential in developing companies across various industries, including three executive search firms in multiple verticals and a boutique career consulting business. He has inspired countless management consultants, technology startup executives, and Fortune 500 leaders to unlock higher performance and build successful careers.
E143 – Transcript
Jason: Welcome to the sales experience podcast. Welcome to another segment of the conversation, Adam Conners. And I had, if you didn’t check it out, make sure to get yesterday’s episode, download that, listen to it, wherever you get your podcast check out part one so you can hear the transition into this part of the conversation. We’re just going to continue to talk about Adam’s feelings about how he is at sales. He thinks he’s horrible at sales. I think he’s actually amazing because he’s not trying to be good at sales and it works out really well. We talk about sales, success, relationships, networking, all kinds of things. And uh, here you go, part 2,enjoy.
Adam: So think about it. If you had that same conversation with at least one person a day minimum, but really think about it, if it was two, three, four, five people a day, how much exponentially more business would you do? How much happier would you feel? How much more of the needle would you be able to move if that was the conversation? And there’s no reason for it not to be.
Jason: Yup. And I think when you’re in sales, a lot of salespeople confuse or get stuck in kind of their sales mode and they forget the relationship side. They forget the conversations. You know, obviously you gotta be purposeful with it because time is money at some point in, especially as sales professionals life, even with networking and all that, some point, you know, you have to make sure that there’s value in it on both sides, but still it’s, you know, it’s about having that and then doing that as much as possible, you know, in the moment.
Adam: Yeah. So I had a, my show, I don’t know the name of Brandon Steiner and he owned Steiner sports. Uh, I don’t know if you’re a sports fan or not, but it’s a memorabilia company and he’s wildly successful. And he came from nothing. And I mean, this guy, he’s already made his millions, very successful. The time I didn’t have many of the people that I’ve had today, I’m that are on my show and I didn’t really know him. I met him once, but he’s very, you know, he was just very giving in his time, his energy. And everything. And for Adam on my show, I’d asked him about, you know, kind of his perspective on networking or relationships and how does he go about things. And you know, he said something that I’ve quoted many times because I just think he really sums it up and he says, Adam says, you’ve got to do is as much as you can for as many people as you can, as often as you can without expecting anything in return.
Adam: And I thought that was just so powerful. And if you think about that, and again that gets back to the long game and uh, you know, are a lot of people going to follow through and a lot of people are going to do those things for you and are they going to let you down when you play out these numbers and you do enough of this stuff and you are light, meaning like you don’t have that scarcity, the number do play themselves out in the cream does rise to the top and you win and that guy’s winning.
Jason: Yeah. So for salespeople who need to or rely on networking for their business, what is some tips like strategies, tactical stuff that you know, that you know works from all your experience?
Adam: Uh, go into a conversation or a relationship with the lens of trying to something that you like in that person, if that makes sense. So you know, because a lot of people have it backwards. They try to get people to like them when that’s, then that’s forced when if you go into it, first of all, again that abundance almost or that lens of, let me see, what can I find about Jason that I like because then when I connect them that what I find about you that I liked first and foremost is going to be very obvious that it’s genuine. You’re also going to like the fact that I’m genuinely interested, you know, people find interesting that they are interested in. So if I’m interested in you, there’s going to be a connection. And then once you found that first thing that I’ve, you know, once I found that first thing about you that I liked, I’m going to find another thing.
Adam: And another thing, another thing, and it’s just going to, and then it’s going to become genuine because it’s just a matter of, again, we all have lots in common. It’s just a matter of, you know, can you identify it? Can you identify it quickly? Do you have that genuine interest? Do you want to make that connection? And then from there you can build a sense of relationship and putting, hopefully, ideally, eventually trust where you can speak candidly, where you don’t necessarily have to be that great salesman, you know, quote unquote, that you can just kind of talk about whatever that product is that your smell or whatever service that you’re offering. And if you have that offering, that’s good, you’ll make the deal. And even if it might not necessarily be as great, they might just because they like you or because they trust you, they know that you’re going to have their best interest and that’s going to be in their best interest to work with someone of your caliber. Again, very likely answer. But I hope that you know, again, as a quick reminder, it’s finding something in the person that you were interested in in that not the other way around can make them like you.
Jason: Okay. So there’s two main parts that I want to touch on because that’s so important. The first is that, you know, you had mentioned finding something in somebody else that you have in common, which is, you know, obviously a good way to go. What does somebody have in common? What do you like? I also think it’s fascinating that people I respect the most in conversations who I feel also drawn to are the ones who maybe ask me questions or want to know about me for the different things. And then they’re fascinated by the differences. Like for me, I’m fascinated by people’s differences as well as the common stuff. When there’s something in common, it’s great. And then the differences are amazing as well. And I think that there has to be that curiosity. A lot of the guests and people I’ve been talking to even recently, you know, and building up to this point with the podcast is that there’s just the successful people out there like they’re just fundamentally curious.
Jason: They want to know about other person. You know, from a sales perspective they’re successful because they were curious cause they want to know about their prospects because they just want to know as much as possible. And that’s basically what you’re talking about is like talk to somebody and find out about them. And the second point that I wanna make, which ties in with that is the one thing I see a lot of salespeople do that I don’t like. I, there’s no right or wrong, like if it works for you, it works for you. But I don’t think it’s as effective is the sales model where it’s, okay, so we’re talking at them now, let me in the beginning of the conversation, let me give you a long monologue about me and why I’m so great and why my company is great and why everything is amazing.
Jason: Why you should buy from me. You know my product or service, whatever it is, and they start out with the me focus about how they’re amazing. Like if you’ve ever been to a trade show or a conference and you walk up to somebody’s booth and literally you just stand there while they’re giving you this long monologue, which you may not even be inappropriate prospect for them. It might be a terrible fit. They don’t even know that they’re just viewing this thing like a robot. And I think that’s really misguided in a waste of time. And basically what you’re saying is go into networking with instead of it being about me, it’s about you. And I know for myself when I network it’s always money. It was like I don’t care about me. Like I don’t want to talk about, I talk about me all the time. Like no, people ask me questions and I’ll diffuse it. It’s like, okay, well no, let’s talk. I’m curious about you. I know my life. Like I don’t want to talk about my life. I want to talk about your life. And you know, that’s a great reminder.
Adam: You nailed it. And I agree with everything you said. But just to be very clear too about what I was saying is that you do want to be able to connect with people, but you want to find something that you liking them. So just to make sure that that was clear because cause and then you know, so I might like that you’re very different. So that could be the thing that I like. Yeah. So, and then you can then find the other things that you can connect on. So just wanted to clarify that point, but I do agree with everything you’re saying.
Jason: Exactly. The key is, you know, find something you like, something fascinating, something to talk about. You know, and obviously if it’s in a business setting or there’s some kind of ultimate, you know, focus on that, then maybe there’s some business interests or some way that network can do. But you know, giving first and being curious. For sure. So, and then the other part that you mentioned, which also refers back to something you said early on in this conversation when we talked before is how you, you do not think of yourself as a salesperson. You actually think you’re a bad maybe terrible sales person. I can’t remember the exact words for how horrible for how you feel about yourself and sales. And, and it’s funny because, so here’s what I think in my experience is you feel like you’re a horrible salesperson. And my guess is it’s because you don’t do what salespeople do.
Jason: And there’s kind of a, not a judgment, cause that’s a strong word, but a feeling that because you don’t use the closing lines and the tactics and these scripts and these processes and persuasion slash manipulation, that because you don’t do those things that you’re not a salesperson or you’re a horrible salesperson. What’s funny to me is that I think by not doing those things and not, you know, trying to be a salesperson, that’s what actually makes you, and a lot of other people amazing at sales because now you’re not trying to sell, you’re just trying to have relationships and or solve problems.
Adam: Well, I mean it’s very kind. I appreciate that. I will, I will listen, I will tell you that, you know, again, you, you compare me to maybe someone else who could be selling some of the same services. They’ll probably have a higher close ratio, if you will, because they’re kind of good at going through the ass where I know that that’s just something that I do not do a good job of. So that’s where some of those things that you talked about could really come in handy and I, and I could definitely benefit from that, but it’s just not something that I’ve been good at. Well,
Jason: and you know, there’s two different ways. Well that’s great. There’s definitely some good episodes in there, especially in this upcoming, in this season. You know? And I think part of that is that self-awareness, which is awesome and that you know that. And then, you know, there’s two strategies. One is to get better at what you could do to help in that performance and how do you get some of those skills and how do you do that? And or at the same time sticking to what you are really good at and leveraging that strength and going all in, which in you is networking relationships, training other people to network, coaching them. You know, once somebody comes on board, I’m sure you basically own them forever because they trust you and they care about your opinion and you’re going to help them in every way that you can. And so that’s great. You also, it’s important to know where your strengths are and you know, where I guess where your happy places and run with that. Like what you have done,
Adam: man. I mean listen, that’s it. To me life is, you know, we only have a, we all share the same amount of time. So I don’t care if you’re the president, Oprah, whoever it is, we all share the same 24 hours. So how are you going to maximize that time? And for me, I, you know, I don’t want to talk to anybody that I do not have to talk to you. You know, again, I’m trying not to, my way of maximizing my time is that I, you know, I love that saying, you know, I’ve kissed enough frogs so, and it’s just, it’s gotten me to a point where I’m just surrounding myself with awesome people. So by doing that, that’s been fantastic. Again, getting back to leading a lighter life and you know, being, feeling psychologically safe saying whatever it is that you want to say, cause you can be comfortable about, you know, who you are or whatever it is that you’re delivering and being honest about whatever it is that you might be quote unquote selling. Again, the comfort and then the success has come with that.
Jason: I’ve been very fortunate. So let’s talk about networking, right? So for salespeople who need the network or business development or you know, expanding their network in such a way that ultimately it would yield some results in any various way. Right? So not in a specific way, but you just never know where it comes from because you’ve been in this game for so long in person networking, online networking, phone calls, like what is your thought on those different kind of networking vehicles?
Adam: Sure, great question. Technology is a blessing and a curse. Ultimately a blessing. It’s a tool. So take advantage of this. I mean, you and I, thanks that, you know, we’re on different coasts, we’ve met through other people. All of the correspondence has happened as a result of technology. So technology is our friend. At the same time, you’ll never be able to replace in-person. It’s just, it’s chemically impossible. There’s oxytocin that is released when you sit in, you know, like right now I’m looking at you via the camera. I’ve spared you from having to look at,
Adam: you know, so the same correspondence. If we were in person, whether we were, we’d be aware of it or not, we’d be releasing that chemical a lot to close it. And that’s just that, you know, even though I do feel good, you feel better. And there’s a lot to be said about shaking somebody’s hand. There’s a lot to be said about patents and we’re on the back. Irreplaceable. That time is just, you just, you can’t substitute so, but with the technology affords you the ability to do this, to be in contact more frequently. You can everything from even sending a text, you know, sometimes we’re all busy doing a lot of things. We are occupied, but technology has afforded us opportunities to let people know that we’re thinking about them. You know, we can connect to other people. So, you know, I’m, I’m a fan, but again, just to keep in mind that it’s a tool.
Adam: It’s not necessarily a cross. You know, you’re building a house, your relationships are the house. You can’t build it just with a hammer. You know, you need nails, you need screwdrivers, you know you need plywood and stone and electric and all these other things that you need in order to build a really nice house. And the same with some of these relationships. So you need to meet in person, you need to be able to make phone calls. You need to be able to send texts to need to be able to send emails, all those things combined to really build that relationship house.
Jason: Alright, that’s it for part two of four. Again, if you haven’t, make sure to subscribe and that way you can get alerts, get the episodes every single day they come out. Make sure to subscribe, rate review if possible, and then go to cutterconsultinggroup.com where you can find all of Adam’s information, his links, the transcription from this show, and leave you like I always do. Keep in mind, everything in life has sales and people will remember the experience you gave them.